Push it.

I have been spending an inordinate amount of time at Nostalgia, sitting on the suede couches, staring at books.

For those of you that don't know, this fall I will be teaching Comm 4610 Magazine Writing at the University of Utah.

This, more or less, freaks me out. That's why I've been spending so much time at the coffee shop: preparing. I know the subject fairly well, but it's the materials and the teaching methodology that has me worried. When it comes right down to it, I have no idea how to teach a class, let alone an upper division college class.

Which is exactly why it's freaking me out: I have the possibility of failing at this. It's been a long time since I've done something that truly challenges me, and it's getting to me, just a bit. I mean, lots of things are difficult, but they're usually difficult in the sense that they take a lot of work to accomplish. Classes I take, for example: for the most part, if you show up, read the material, study hard, you get an A. It's just a matter of putting the time into it.

But this...this I don't know how to do. It will require more than just work. It will require learning a new skill, not just acquiring more knowledge.

The fact that it's been a long time since I've attempted something honestly challenging tells me something about myself: Do harder things.

Complacency is something to avoid. Comfort should be used as a landing pad while you get your bearings for the next big push.

I need to push harder.

I'm excited for the semester to begin.